Michel Chapoutier: wines, sex and mythology !
1m57, lame, the most important producer of biodynamy in France, feels affection for sexual metaphors to talk about wine, Michel Chapoutier is definitely an atypical ! Also by his itinerary: he buys the company to “Labdacos”, his grandfather in 1990, after a first successful vintage 1989 and many years of mediocre quality in the hands of his father “Laïos”. This “Œdipe” (Jay McInerney) did of his surname a myth ! After Jaboulet and Delas, presentation of the third and last part of the classics of Rhone Valley: “la maison Chapoutier” !
“If you think too much about it, you kill the wine. The brain kills the pleasure. You don’t need to be gynaecologist to make love.” This is the way for Michel Chapoutier to relax some customers during a tasting in his cellar. So no, I didn’t have the chance to meet him and these words are from Jay McInerney in his book (here), but I got to know with his wines ! Then, I follow the advice and I switch off…
The foreplay starts with the white wines, under the aegis of the “Sphinx”, alias Jérémy, watchman of the cellar. The Côte du Rhône Belleruche 2012 gives out a mineral perfume which seduces me, before its freshness and green fruits ruffle…my palate. The balance and the length of this grenache end to hit on me..for 7,40€, I am doing my easy lay ! On trust, I follow my stroll in this oenological Thèbes. In the course of a drink, the Petite Ruche 2012 winks me. This Crozes-Hermitage 100% Marsanne isn’t so easy and stays a little bit closed to the first contact. But this dear reveals herself in the course of the discussion: her beautilful body lets to glimpse some sweeping and smooth feelings, balanced by a touch of acidity. But for 11,60€, I am not unfaithful to Belleruche.
Then suddenly, I heard a really class latin accent to tell me: “Invitare”…charmed by this Condrieu 2012, I accept the invitation. The foreplay becomes more sensual with this Antigone with fruity and apricoted smells. Captivated, the kiss is long, soft and sweet by its mature fruits. Our bodies embrace, the hug is passionate: I can only fall in love ! I never thought that I was able to attract a lady of this stature…but for 32,60€, it’s a guaranteed orgasm !
Jealous, the Chante-Alouette 2012, sitting on the throne of Hermitage, gets out her advantages of biodynamy and ageing in new barrel (1/3). We leave Thèbes and for 44€, we fly for an exotic destination with quince and a body more fleshy. She is beautiful and seducing, but I don’t change: I yield more easily to the viognier than the marsanne. Then sorry Chante-Alouette, but I will stay faithful to Invitare…
My reputation of easy lay echoed near the red wines and the white Petite Ruche talked about to her twin sister 2012, with ruby red tint. Beneath her shy appearance of Crozes-Hermitage, she is fresh and especially eager, but doesn’t have yet all the advantages to seduce. Some parts of her body have to ripen…but for 10,8€, I have to watch out for her for next desires 😉 But if this desire to lay a syrah is urgent, then for 13,70€, the attractive Deschants (Saint-Joseph 2011) with red fruits essences, will tempt you with her peppery touch and her enjoyable tannin which draw a beautiful outline…
But an amazing polygamous experience is waiting for me with the Bécasses 2011 ! Gone out of their Côte-Rôtie,their red ruby and limpid dresses are coquettish. Coming closer, one attracts me by a chocolate-flavoured, while the other tempts me by her liquorice. Together, the melger is intense, the ardour is “cherried” and the orgasm spontaneous ! And they are not to their height…for 41€, that should be interesting !
However, affairs after affairs, I yearn for my Penelop. And if she is named Sizeranne. Born in 2010 in Hermitage, she has the garnet-colored and intense features, making clear a straight and strong personality. Even if she is open to the dialogue, she remains complex to understand. The red cherry becomes “kirsched”, and “chocolated” before to bring me in the wood, for a great buccal affair ! So, she takes the matter in her own hands thanks to her trust, shows me her desire by her voluptuous body, but she is still elegant and exciting by her melted kisses with a fooled length…From the beginning, by her bodice, I would guess that I had things with a lady, a true one !
As you can guess, I leave again this sexual marathon completly blooming. True natural and organic delight, because as “Œdipe” Chapoutier says: “Filter a wine, it’s like to make love with a condom”.